Running Away From Things I Need to Be Doing
I've been living on savings for more than a year. It started out because I really wanted to pursue my hobbies: a couple of web services, game development, things like that.
I live a very frugal life. I don't spend money unless I need to. I'm extremely averse to consumerism. I cook all my meals from scratch. I waste nothing. I walk everywhere I need to go. I haven't driven a car for over three years. My phone is a simple phone I've had so long I can't remember when I got it. The phone bill is 14 dollars a month. My server for my hobby projects is a cheap VPS so the cost is negligible. I occasionally make an exception where I splurge on something I don't really need but the dysphoria that comes with it causes it to not happen very often. I wouldn't say I'm great with money but I'm amazing at not spending money which has enabled me to live this kind of lifestyle without working for so long.
Increasingly I am not getting the same satisfaction from my hobbies as I was when this started. I used to spend more time than you would spend at a full time job doing those things so it was justified in a way. I was occupied a healthy amount, learning new skills, but... I'm more jaded about these things than I originally was, less motivated to work on them, and the feeling that it's time to go back to work has been palpable for months.
I need to stop running away from that.